I haven’t groomed my armpits for a little over four months, and dayuuumn, I’ve been having way too much fun scaring the people in my house with the very fine hairs on the part of my body where hair naturally grows. I never planned on growing out my armpit hair so long, but the way people reacted to it just intrigued me so much that it became a really, really fun little game for one.
If I wanted to scare or annoy my brothers, or let’s say I wanted something from them, I would follow them around the house with one arm up and they would run away like they stole something, because obviously, armpit hair on women will cause sudden death. Now, that’s some serious shit right there. Better run, bitches.
At first, my dad would just giggle and point at his armpit and ask me “what’s that?”
“That thing! That *giggles, points at armpits* THAT!”
“Oh, this? What about it?”
Constant teasing in time slowly turned into concern. Like, really, deep concern. My dad came up to me, mimicking armpit waxing, and said, “How much is that? To remove, how much is that? I’ll pay for it!”. On some days, he would leave my maid extra money for me to finally get a wax but I would just pocket the money. Cha-ching!
My mom, just like my dad, started off with just laughing at and teasing me at first. Until another month passed by and she would invite me to go with her to the waxing salon every two weeks. I’m guessing I’m just naturally a ~Rebel~ Wilson, because I never came with. The game plan was clear: I’ll get my wax when ya’ll stop giving a fuck. Why? Because you can’t tell me what to do with my body. AAAAND, it was just really fun, I can’t lie. 😆
Because, wake up, ya’ll. It’s fucking HAIR. It fucking GROWS THERE. Did some rich, entitled, powerful white guy just stand up decades ago one day and decided “Guys, armpit hair on women ain’t cool anymore.” Seriously??? I’m still confused. Someone. Please. Enlighten me.
But finally, the day has come where no one in this house gave a fuck. Soooo, it’s just not fun anymore. So, yes, I got it all waxed off 😦 I have to say, I felt a little sad. It’s like my armpit hair and I were so attached (literally), you know? But life is short! Just gotta find new things to annoy people with. And it isn’t that hard! Sometimes, it just takes a little fucking hair where it fucking grows.